COVID-19 Quarantine Blog: Day 8 (late post)

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This was originally a scheduled post for Monday 3/23 but somehow it didn’t post. Grrrr.

Dear Diary,

I didn’t write anything yesterday because I was watching TV. All day. Like a lazy bum. It was fabulous. I did try to convince my male counterpart that it was the perfect day to attempt to destroy the growing rainforest within our compound. Turns out he was being a lazy bum too. We’re still perfect for each other, after 10 years of marriage. And the back yard is still a rainforest today.

So, I haven’t left the compound since Friday. Today I get to go out! I’m excited to see outside the compound but not excited about the purpose of the adventure. My male counterpart will be escorting me to the torture and interrogation unit oral surgeon this afternoon. I will be rendered unconscious, injected with a truth serum, and they will place knives and other weapons in my mouth. While the thought of pain is not my idea of fun, I’m more concerned about my male counterpart taking the opportunity to interrogate me and post a video for the world to see. I’m well known for my verbal vomit after being anesthetized. I’m not looking forward to this. I once called a former supervisor after surgery, and described in horrific detail, the things I would like to do to him. In my defense, I do not remember any of it, except for the tidbits I was told by my HR department later. I was not released from employment because I was legally impaired and thus not responsible for my actions. But, I was unable to face said supervisor again without a red face on both of us.

Stay tuned.

Summer

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